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| Wednesday, March 21st, 2007 | | 11:53 am |
Hello world
Just wondering if any of you ever read my journal!
So an update is probably in order.
Still at college, except I am going to graduate this summer- wooo!
One more final left for this quarter, then its a small break where I will cram in all these 'future' issues and Get-Em-Done. Maybe go to Joey's and have some fun, regaining sanity.
Future?
Hopefully I will be applying for OCS (Officer Canidate School), and hopefully get accepted before I graduate so that I can blast down to Pensacola for 4.5 months and be a commissioned officer (better pay scale).
And with that, I leave it up to you. Respond, tell me how you are- what you are doing...
Current Mood:  interestedCurrent Music: Video fan whirring | | Tuesday, March 6th, 2007 | | 12:16 pm |
| | Saturday, March 18th, 2006 | | 12:55 pm |
We bought a kayak, a double crosswind. It's old but should prove to be most enjoyable! Water here we come! Oh yeah and I need a 10 foot chain please. | | Saturday, October 8th, 2005 | | 1:56 pm |
| | Sunday, September 25th, 2005 | | 11:44 am |
I really like Little House on the Prairie. Thats how people should live. Current Mood:  contemplativeCurrent Music: Country | | 11:43 am |
I had a dream...
Sarah showed up at our door wearing a gas mask and a whole bunch of colorful scarfs. I invited her in. Boy was that interesting. Current Mood:  energeticCurrent Music: Some kind of country (93.7FM) | | Thursday, September 22nd, 2005 | | 1:43 pm |
Ahem
Der Kommandant
Achtung! You are 30% brainwashworthy, 63% antitolerant, and 85% blindly patriotic
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Opportunistic, patriotic to a fault, and not so fond of people who aren't just like you, you are like a Nazi General.
Back in Germany in the 1940's, you would have been at the top of the
asshole list. Not for Nazism, necessarily, but for your own sick,
twisted values. Then, out of superior intelligence (relative to other
Nazis, that is), you would've climbed to the top.
Conclusion: you would have been a Nazi, and most likely would have served them well.
- new test, it rules, take it -
The Terrorism Test
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My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: | You scored higher than 28% on brainwashworthy | | You scored higher than 88% on antitolerant | | You scored higher than 94% on patriotic |
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Current Mood:  creativeCurrent Music: But I wouldnt kill anybody. | | Monday, September 12th, 2005 | | 3:48 pm |
| | Saturday, September 10th, 2005 | | 1:42 pm |
We were merely freshmen
I believe I will major in electronics engineering. Wish me luck. Chewy, get Ravin up! Current Mood:  hungryCurrent Music: The Verve Pipe- The Freshmen | | Sunday, September 4th, 2005 | | 3:23 am |
| | Saturday, September 3rd, 2005 | | 8:58 pm |
So I was digging round and found a Kow Korner hat. Anyone remember that place? Current Mood: calm | | Tuesday, August 30th, 2005 | | 6:52 pm |
Reflections
Good afternoon all. Just wondering who will notice this entry. First one to reply wins! Current Mood: jubilantCurrent Music: Liebe ist by Nena | | Friday, October 8th, 2004 | | 7:54 pm |
A word to the wise
I was reading Summer H's lj and was inspired to write a bit of philosophy/musings in response to her post on 9/30/04. First of all, belief in an omnipotent and omniscient God would limit a "free and boundless will" on one spectrum, but the exciting question is... can these two elements exist conjointly? I think that the answer to your original question about morality lies embedded in the definition of sin. If what one characterizes as a wrongdoer is based on the moral constrains of ones own heart or that of an entire nation is the truly important variable to consider. Take the aboriginal inhabitants of this earth for instance. We know that through social isolation an entire culture can remain virtually static, using this we are able to examine the myriad of culture that exists today which is similar if not identical to its original form. Many of these primitive inhabitants sustain themselves with a moderated form of traditional horticulture/fishing and gathering. They practice pagan rituals of religion and have no knowledge of God (referring to the Puritan/European God), yet they co-exist with seemingly astounding levels of happiness and success. Now one may be as crass as to assume that their whole social structure is founded on a immoral substratum, one that is dedicated to immoral deeds and character (and hence their happiness is stemmed from doing evil), however let us consider a more appropriate perspective. If the deeds and actions exhibited from these tribal members are genuinely acting inclusive to the structure of their own tribes morality and standards yet when compared to Christianity they founder, are they considered sinful? You see, it is completely dependent on who is viewing these actions and what their personal morals are. An action when judged against your heart is sinful for that individual only if they are aware of its negative attributes (ie that it is indeed sinful and wrong). But merely by its obvious transgression at one angle this does not immediately condemn the person taking part. You see, knowledge is power... but power is dangerous :) In the bible it says that even if you doubt your action for the most fleeting moment and you still perform this deed, you have sinned. It is your knowledge of sin that creates your sin. But it is impossible to go through life ignorant, this is how we are all sinners. It is not the bible's passages that teach us right from wrong and it is not the bible that condemns us to a life of sin. It is the everyday, mundane and seemingly trivial decisions that we make. The bible is merely a travel guide in order to point you in the right direction when you are lost. Everyone began with bountiful possibilities, what it all comes down to is simply this: "Do we do what is right, or do we do what is easiest?" God is in all of us and works with us in ways that we cannot comprehend. The important thing is to follow your heart and keep faith. To do things for the sake of others, to be kind and faithful, to justify your existence. | | Saturday, November 1st, 2003 | | 12:35 pm |
Noramastricularphenrologiceratilligaterdurooom
I'm at my lib job now. Things are fairly slow. I didnt do much for halloween. Stayed at home, ordered a pizza and played on the computer. I have the rest of today and tommorow to finish my essay. That guy who I just checked out a labtop too smelled horrible... I swear cigarretes are the most disgusting thing imaginable. Who would actually breathe in toxic smoke for fun? Phil was not there last thursday when I drove down to practice m/a. I dont exactly know what is happening with that situation. I hope it was only because it was the day before halloween. Speaking of which, how was everyones halloween? Who went trick or treating!?!? I did not eat much candy. But I drank a fairly large portion of pepsi last night. Which when combined with the pizza did not leave me in the healthiest condition. Mel doesnt like livejournal very much... well in reality at all, but I miss having a way to explain and express myself. I will try to update more. My schoolwork does not leave me with much time however. That and bouncing between my dorm and her apartment constantly. I have not finished the rest of "Judith Sargent Murray" a text that is required to read for Hist 103. I will have to continue reading after I type this entry I suppose. I tried to get somewhat caught up on everyones lj readings. I was surprised to see Landen writing about Bellingham. I thought that would be really cool if he could move up here. How is your job Landen? Joey is going to be moving soon. I am really happy for him. It is so great to see him taking steps to further himself in this world. Just leaving his house will be so much better for him. I really hope that he pursues Devry also. I havent talked to Lindy in a while. There are so many things to say... I was wondering about Daniel, wondering what happened with him. I've talked to Bekah. She seems like she is doing ok. Meggie I talked to briefly also on MSN. Sounds like she has a plan that will work, I am glad. Sarah hates me. Sarah, I wish you the best, I hope you are doing ok. Summer C I dont talk to at all anymore. But she sounds happy, so I am very happy for her and her bf. Patrick I havent seen or talked to in quite a while. He is probably still playing nintendo games and PS2... Ryan B I talked to on MSN. Hes working at McDonalds. He sounds actually very together. He asked a lot of questions too, I liked that. Anyone know how Bonni is? Well, I'm off to see the wizard- err read. :) Current Mood: jubilantCurrent Music: Oh wont you dance with me! | | Thursday, October 30th, 2003 | | 3:20 pm |
Memories
I'm in my first quarter at college. It's sad but I don't have any time to write. I actually miss high school. Its crazy but I do. I miss how easy things were. I miss having literally no responsiblity. I miss my friends and how close everyone was. I miss running track, and the bus rides. I miss singing on the bus. I can still hear Bryan Harada's laugh if I concentrate. I guess thats a typical ramification of being around thousands of people that you do not recognize every day. My smallest class is still 60 students. My psychology class is an astonishing 450 students large. I went to Libbey beach today for no apparant reason. The waves were larger then I've seen them in a long time. I thought about her today, I dared not go to the bluffs. On the way out I waved to Sarah's mom...still driving the rorange jimmy and I couldnt help but look to her house on my way out... Everything looks so hollow. Everything has changed. At western I have not gone to even one party. Brian N was going to have a halloween part and I would have felt very much obligated to participate but he has to work instead. Which is relieving. I have to write an essay. Goodbye for now. I miss you guys. God be with you. May you all find peace. Current Mood: grateful | | Monday, August 11th, 2003 | | 5:23 pm |
I am very disturbed by summers comment. Now I'm left with the puzzling feeling of whether or not I should claim stupidity for not being smart enough to know what "cheating" I have supposedly been doing... or to admit to a false accusation. Summer, you did give me an "out"- many times, its true- I completly agree- AND yes, not once did I say "summer I dont want to be your friend". And you know why that is??? Because I did want to be your friend! In all of the time that we have known each other I have never pretended to be friends with you. Back in 10th grade I foolishly pretended that I wasnt your friend when patrick was around... and that is all I am guilty of. I have been very truthful to you, and though you cannot see it you have shaped my life in a profound and positive way. It seems to me that you have misinterpreted what I was saying when I wrote "sometimes when I'm with her I can be how I was because I'm pretending". I admit that to anyone but the writer (me) they would have the same reaction as you. I did not write that to say that our friendship was fake, I wrote that truthfully to describe how unstable I was around you. And how hard it was for me to be "just a friend". It may not have been hard for you, but I can still remember it very well. I am a pretty "physical" person. Of this you know. The contact, to me; is similar in importance to sight. When I used to play around with Lindy- I am not "hitting on her" or groping her or something- I am merely being friendly, as I try for everyone. I am very distressed to hear that you do not take it the way it is meant to be. Honestly, I did try to be your friend. If you have blinded yourself to recognizing that then I dont know what to say. My whole senior year I was under an extreme amount of pressure, and the situation with melody then surely increased it fourfold. When I think back on all that we've done, and all of the times that we have had together I do not cringe, or grimace, and I am not angry or upset. I am glad to have been a part of your life, and I am grieved to learn that you wish us to be together no more. I always dread unresolved conflict- especially in personalized issues regarding me directly. I do not appreciate the fact that you hold me in such low esteem, and though I am willing to change that- I am not going to lie and say I'm sorry. I am not sorry for what I've done and quite frankly it sucks a lot that you are. One thing that I will never stand for is for you to dare to compare me to my fears. It seems to me that you are acting highly off emotional despair, and your words- that flow so easily from your mouth accusing me of becoming all that I never wanted to be are a direct result thereof. But these words- so mechanized in your brain have meaning in my world. And they are powerful weapons. Do not use them foolishly as you are starting to do. You need to open your eyes to what you are saying. How dare you accuse me of being undevoted. Shame on you. I would liek you to name these people I have "fooled around with". And tell me what I have done wrong. How have I sinned? How can you say that I am less then completly devoted to Melody... how in the world do you begin to feel holy enough to even begin to judge me? Your emotionally shallow accusations must cease. Do not make a mockery of me and my life, I will not listen to your spiteful murmurings. Think about the circumstances before developing such rash opinions. You have no right to feel betrayed. I could throw an avalanche of horrendous words in your direction, but I won't. For the memory of once was. | | 5:20 pm |
WTF?
Re: Joey IS my friend. (Anonymous) 2003-08-10 23:31 (link) Select ummm, hi, this is summer...i didnt say you did anything to me, and i glad you didnt, the least interaction with you, the better! you piss me off you know that? i never asked you to pretend to be my friend, to pretend anything with me! all i asked was for you to be honest, be my friend or not, i gave you an out numerous times, and never did you say "summer i dont want to be your friend" and if that was how you felt, that was all i asked for you to say to me...in that respect, yes, you did screw with my mind. AND as for me freakin out everytime you tried to touch me, you know thats a lie...i never feaked out, i just didnt like you doing it cuz you did it in a way that reminded me of how you used to be towards me, as for the cheater part...well, hopefully you are smart enough to figure that out on your own. you say that you wanted to be my friend and tried, but that i know is a lie, i was the one trying to be YOUR friend, what you did could hardly be called trying...but anyhow...hey i have a Q for you regarding this comment..."Sometimes when I'm with her I can be how I was because I'm pretending." why act like you did before, why pretend? I never asked for it, in act you already said that i would "freak out" anytime you tried to touch me, so if you were pretending, why so? just because? maybe it was fun? you never noticed that i didnt care did you? lol, thats funny you now, pretening for someone who really didnt care what you were doing. its been a long time since wanted to be with you adrian, even towards the end at school, mostly i was seeng thing in you that i was amazed i was too blind to see before, it seemed like everything you said you never wanted to be,you were becoming, or had already become...sometimes you just made me feel sorry for you, and sometimes you made me think about whether tryin to be your friend was a good idea considering the fact that you were everything i never wanted in a friend. hmmm, you know what, i wouldnt tell her, bu i think maybe melody should know about the people you hvae fooled around with, you being so "devoted" to her and all, youd probly be truthful with her also, right? maybe you should be the one to tell her...anyway, i dont say you are the are the bad guy completely, i and the other people who have fooled around with you are also reponsible for choosing to fool around with a guy who had a gf whether what they did was a big deal or not, and you dokinda lead girls on, and you know im not the only one saying it...anyhow, i really hope i dont see you anytime soon, dont know what ill do, you have made me really angry and i feel very betrayed. so...good luck with your life and hopefully our paths never cross anytime soon, that wouldnt be pleasant. goodbye | | Monday, July 28th, 2003 | | 6:20 pm |
Breaking free
The computer seems to call me less often then it used to, its amazing how different things are. Pretty soon I will not remember it at all. I read Bekahs lj but have not been interested in anything else. Its all so dismal and pathethic looking back now. I feel like I am almost a complete different person. And I am, I've grown. I can fly. Pretty soon I will no longer be held by those terrible, unseen bonds, squeezing my neck. Ridgeway Gamma- RG522, thats my room, my home. My brothers left yesterday to visit my dad and of course I was ditched. They are going to see my mom in August (also in canada) but they somehow forgot to get me a ticket... Just because I am going to college doesnt mean I've died- doesnt mean that I dont need a place to stay, a "home". I am mad at her for never calling me. And even more annoyed that she has the nerve to be angry at me for not being in contact with her. I am working 40 hours a week at PL now, I'm getting mostly morning shifts so I get off either at 4:30 or 5:30. Saturday I borrowed Josh's truck and went diving at Keystone. Sunday- Melody rented some eq and came with. I took my camera and we got pictures. I have completed 5 open water dives, fulfilling the requirement. All I have to do now is take my written exam and I will get my dive license and number. Diving is such an awesome experience! I was hoping to take my test today after work but for some reason the dive shop closes at 5 instead of six on Monday's (I was 15 minutes late). :( On the way up the island I saw wummer and two other people who I didnt know biking by san de fuca. My car is out of the shop- I will pick it up after work today when I pick up M and my little bro from PL. I've been driving Brandon's car for over a week and a half now. Later today I am going to call the retail clerks and ask them about my insurance coverage. I found out some good news today about my vacation time. I have been bumped up to 40 hours of vacation time- and I even have a personal day that I will get paid for too. Also since my last day at PL is Sept 2nd- I will be paid an extra 4 hours of vacation time for every 300 hours total that I have worked at PL! :) I'm at the SVC lib atm, I really cant stand to be around the weird people here and so many people clicking at once is getting to my brain- I'll check the oil on Brandon's car and go driving... My bottom tooth/jaw feels funny... cavity? I need my insurance card! Where the heck is everyone? Feels like I'm on the opposite side of the planet. So many things have changed... I know what I want out of my life, I know my hobbies, my goals, and who I want to take with me. I am filled with a new driving force- stronger then petty love, I'm not entirely sure EXACTLY how things are going to work- but I do know that they are going to. I can do ANYTHING. This realization is such a fascinating epiphany. I know who my friends are. I know who my friends arent. I was stabbed in the back it seems Lin. I was blind to what you were doing, perhaps you dont even know it yourself. I am not right to judge you in such a way. I dont have to feel guilty anymore- ever, I am done feeling sorry for myself and remembering- I know that it was not my fault and that we are done, completely finished. Sarah is right though, I cant be friends with her, hell I may never even see her again... but, I do wish her well on her journey. And I pray that she finds the happiness she is so recklessly seeking. >>>Goodbye<<< Sarah. May you find your way soon. :) As for me, I will continue to live, and breathe, and love. Afterall, what else is life about? Current Mood: DrivenCurrent Music: Saying goodbye | | Thursday, July 10th, 2003 | | 1:57 pm |
I've read too many of Sarah's entries
Do I lead lots of girls on? I am completely devoted to Mel. Its been so long since I've thought of High school, and I am SO glad its over. I hated having to see that look on Sarah's face- how I had to feel horrendously guilty whenever mel came to lunch or something... its all over now... I'm not bitter- I'm sorry for anything I've done, or said, its all misinterpretation. I just cant do anything anymore- I am so happy now, I will never go back. I cant be her friend- she makes me feel like a horrible person. I cant be friends with someone who does that to me right? I wonder if being sorry even matters in the long run. | | 1:26 pm |
Hello again
I thought it was rather interesting myself... that doesnt leave me with much time! Damn, I'll barely be out of college and on my own... *ponder* I havent written in a long time- this last month has been phenomonal, I cannot even describe it. Mel and I are planning a 2 or more week trip in the San Juans in september- its gonna be great! Chewy- Man, I havent even seen you in forever! you dont talk much, I tried that one day on AA but you seemed rather disconnected. Lemme know a day and we can actually do something. :) Happy fun rainbow day!!!! Current Mood:  workingCurrent Music: Library keyboard clicks |
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